Is work-life balance possible to achieve?
Picture this: a typical Sunday morning in our house, back when we both worked as consultants. We always looked forward to a much needed lie in after a busy week supporting our numerous and demanding clients. We'd savour a delicious brunch and spend time together just unwinding and enjoying the peace.
One Sunday morning that I still remember well, one of the work phone lines rang in our home office just after 8am. It was back in the days when we had separate work landlines with no caller ID! He rushed off to the office to answer the phone, and I yelled after him "Leave it!!! - Don't they know it's Sunday?". He answered the phone anyway. After 20 minutes or so, he returned from the office and told me it was just as well he answered it, as it was an important new client on the brink of a huge new IT project for him... "Oh that's alright then" I said, secretly conflicted inside....
There's the rub. I've always very much appreciated and valued our down-time together, but at that point I was also quite ambitious for our businesses, and I always got excited about the prospect of taking on new projects. It occurred to me later that evening, that our principles and values are only strong to a point. Everyone from time to time will feel conflicted when their principles are challenged. The work phone ringing on a Sunday morning was one of those situations for. But rather than beat myself up for too long for not sticking to my principles, I decided it was time to remind myself of why I believe in balancing work and non-work activities, and to put some "all-year resolutions" into place.
First, consider the benefits of achieving better work-life balance
- Increased resilience - inevitable stressful situations are experienced as less threatening and leave less of a mark.
- Increased tolerance of other people's behaviour - which protects relationships both in and out of work.
- Better decision making and problem solving - clearer thought processes help me to identify not just obvious solutions, and to be more decisive.
- Enhanced productivity - when rested, I can plough through administrative tasks as at a rate of knots. Whereas when I'm overdoing it, it becomes like wading through treacle.
- Higher motivation - I absolutely love my job. But I appreciate it most when I'm looking after myself too.
- Optimum performance - without a doubt, I can get into "The Zone" quicker and stay there longer when I've had some time off to recuperate and recharge my batteries.
All of which leads to greater productivity, happier customers and increased personal and business success... When spelling it out like that, it sounds worth going for it, doesn't it?!
The four step plan (How to improve your work-life balance)
- Put down-time in the diary - It may seem a bit over controlling, but if you're used to working with a diary, then having an "appointment" to go out for a nice long walk with your family, or to mow the lawn, or whatever you find relaxing - then you're more likely to stick with it and not get pulled into work activities at any time of the day or night. We have a long standing joke at home that we plan to do something spontaneous every Saturday. Sounds a bit ironic, but seriously, it works!
- Evaluate and re-prioritise what you do with your time - If you take a look at how you spend your waking hours, you'll probably find that you spend quite a bit of time on people and activities that aren't valuable or life-enhancing. I don't mean finding chores that you hate, but looking for things that you're in the habit of doing that really don't give you many benefits. This could be spending excessive time "doomscrolling" on your phone, or being a perfectionist and spending too long on getting unimportant tasks absolutely right. If you can stop yourself from wasting valuable time, you can replace it with more creative, joyful or relaxing activities that bring you the balance that you're looking for.
- Don't do, delegate - A great example of a book that can inspire change without getting further than the title! Take a look at tasks that you currently do, both in and out of work, that you might be able to pass on (maybe just in part) to a willing helper. Looking to share tasks with other people will give them an opportunity to work with you and to learn from you. Don't keep your (washing-up) skills to yourself!
- Invigorate and rejuvenate - If you think "exercise" is an eight letter word, then find an activity that gets you up off your desk chair, or off of your sofa, and gets your blood pumping. Better still, an activity that gets fresh air into your lungs and daylight onto your skin. Research has shown that this will work wonders to clear your head and keep you more alert. It could be a brisk walk, a game of football, or a spot of digging in the garden. Failing that, try a cool (not cold) shower, get someone to give you a regular back and shoulder massage, or take up some form of yoga or meditation.
So there it is, hardly rocket science, but making a few small changes will make all the difference. Do I still answer the phone on a Sunday morning? Yes, sometimes... but we're all a work in progress, so that's okay!
Author: Tina Halperin, Founder H2 Training, Coaching & Consultancy